Halloween Special Funny

 

Rules for Halloween for Seniors in the U.S.A.

 

 

 

You know you are too old to Trick or Treat when:
10. You keep knocking on your own front door.

9. You remove your false teeth to change your appearance.

8. You ask for soft high fiber candy only.

.

 

7. When someone drops a candy bar in your bag,

And you lose your balance and fall over.

6. People say: 'Great Boris Karloff Mask,'
And you're not wearing a mask.

5. When the door opens you yell, 'Trick or...'

And you can't remember the rest.

4. By the end of the night,

You have a bag full of restraining orders.

 

3. You have to carefully choose a costume that doesn't dislodge your hairpiece.

 

.

2. You're the only Power Ranger in the

Neighborhood with a walker.

 

And the number one reason Seniors should not go

Trick Or Treating...
*
*
*
1. You keep having to go home to pee.

No matter, have a HAPPY HALLOWEEN anyway.

Just Checking In

 

Not much going to report on this week, we did get out Friday and went to the movies.

 

Angela and I went and saw

I was not sure how I was going to like see a cartoon but in 3D it was awesome and really enjoyed it.

I tried to make a pizza like Sam does. Think I will stick with the frozen kind it doesn't look to bad but lacked a lot in the taste area.

 

Man if our weeks where any more exciting than this week I don’t know what I would do.

Maybe I will look in my box of funnies and post a Halloween special tomorrow .

In tell I find or do something exciting in my life have a good week.

ONE DAY CLOSER TO OUR DREAM

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!! (Wednesday Funny)

 

 

Happy Halloween!!
You've been Mooned!!

One rule to this game....

You can NOT get someone who has already gotten you!

Now...
go out there and get as
many people as you can,
before they get you!

I got you first! and you can't get me back!

Nana - Nana - Nana!
(ha ha)

We do not stop playing because we
grow old;

we grow old because we stop playing.

NEVER BE THE FIRST ONE TO GET OLD!!!

 

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!

 

ONE DAY CLOSER TO OUR DREAM

Another Week Down

 

We had another non eventful week here in the Midwest. At least the weather was nice.

Monday was Angela’s birthday so we went out to eat.

It’s located on a old farm,they are famous for there chicken served family style.

   

If you notice in the picture on the right you can see a little white building which is a church on the restaurant grounds.

This is the church our my daughter was married in.

 

Another week down and getting closer to the big prize. I have been doing some research on ways to earn money when we hit the road.

We know with the economy the way it’s heading we are going to have to find jobs here and there to make ends meet.  But that’s ok we want to keep active as long as we can.

We plan on by next spring to getting serious looking for the 5th wheel and truck. I would like to find a package deal truck and 5th wheel. Also on the wish list is to find one that has solar power and generator all set up for boon docking which is what we want to do most of the time.  

 

ONE DAY CLOSER TO OUR DREAM

Wednesday Funny

 

To all you Lexiphiles .... (those who love playing on words)

 

To write with a broken pencil is pointless

When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.

A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

When the smog lifts in Los Angeles , U.C.L.A.

The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground.

The batteries were given out free of charge.

A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.

A will is a dead giveaway.

If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.

With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat miner.

You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

Local Area Network in Australia: The LAN down under.

A boiled egg is hard to beat.

When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.

Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

If you take a laptop computer for a run you could jog your memory.

A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.

In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your Count that votes.

When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.

He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.

Acupuncture: a jab well done.

ONE DAY CLOSER TO OUR DREAM

Another Week Closer

 

Another week gone by and not a whole lot happening around here. I have been riding the new Honda scooter as much as I can and it sure is a lot of fun,taken the back roads thru the countryside and seeing all the trees turning there fall colors.

A couple of weeks ago we had the grandson Riley over to spend the weekend. So this weekend was his twin sister Savannah turn to spend sometime here.

She sure looks good on pa pa’s scooter.

They like staying here because they get a special bed partner to sleep with.

                      

Max makes them feel safe and he likes to snuggle up to sleep.

Monday is going to be Angela’s birthday and she will be xxx I better not say,she might read this.

Savannah wanted to make her a birthday cake and surprise her.

      The next Vanna White….

That’s about as exciting as our week went. Looking forward to getting out at least one or two more times camping before old man winter shows him self.

ONE DAY CLOSER TO OUR DREAM

Wednesday Funny

 

 

** Adult Truths ***

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

17. How come teenagers spend all day "digitally communicating", but when you ask them what's new, they say nothing!

18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever..

22. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

23. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.

24. People who forward e- mail without deleting the tons of previous recipients should be shot and then tarred and feathered.

25. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important. Ladies quit Laughing!


Heal the past, live the present, dream the future.
Enjoy life!!!

ONE DAY CLOSER TO OUR DREAM

Camping And Our New TOAD

 

First we want to thank you for all the nice comments left by our RV friends on our Saturday blog for our Lady Bug.

 

We did have some fun this week, After learning not to go camping on the weekends, we went Wednesday and Thursday to Smithville Lake it’s a Army Corps of Engineers lake.

 

It was not crowed and very peaceful all the dog got lots of rest in the fresh air.

 

They have a nice paved trail around the camp ground so we got out for some exercise.

We had a nice relaxing time but there was something missing.. With having a motor home we have no way to go anywhere to explore the area  outside  the camp ground.

So when we got back Friday we went looking for a TOAD and this is what we found and bought.

  It’s a Honda Elite 110cc its big enough for both of us to ride on and be able to do some site seeing. 

ONE DAY CLOSER TO OUR DREAM

R.I.P. Lady Bug (2000–2011)

I usually don’t post a blog on Saturday but today is a sad day for us. We had to put our oldest dog Lady Bug to sleep today. 

This is a picture of her 2 days ago on her last camping trip,she enjoyed her self laying out in the fresh air and laying in the grass.

She has had a hard time getting up and walking for quite a while and in the last few day she didn’t want to get up hardly at all.

She will be missed as part of our pack.. 

She loved riding in our golf cart..

Wednesday Funny

 

The top 31 things that you will never hear a Southern boy say:

31. When I retire, I'm movin' North.

30. Oh I just couldn't. She's only sixteen.

29. I'll take Shakespeare for $1000, Alex.

28. Duct tape won't fix that.

27. Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken.

26. We don't keep firearms in this house.

25. You can't feed that to the dog.

24. That car is too old and unsafe to drive.

23. Wrestling is fake.

22. We're vegetarians.

21. Do you think my gut is too big?

20. I'll have grapefruit and grapes instead of biscuits and gravy.

19. Honey, we don't need another dog.

18. Who gives a rat's ass who won the Civil War?

17. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.

16. Too many deer heads detract from the decor.

15. I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today.

14. Trim the fat off that steak.

13. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.

12. The tires on that truck are too big.

11. I've got it all on the C: DRIVE.

10. Unsweetened tea tastes better.

9. My fiance, Bobbie Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.

8. I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.

7. Checkmate

6. She's too young to be wearing a bikini.

5. Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.

4. I don't have a favorite college team.

3. You guys.

2. Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Becky Mae.....darlin'

AND THE NUMBER ONE THANG THAT YOU WILL NEVER HEAR A SOUTHERN BOY SAY:

1. Nope, no more for me. I'm driving!

 

ONE DAY CLOSER TO OUR DREAM

Not Much

 

We had a slow week not much going on around here.

Friday we had one of the twin grandkids over to spend the weekend it was Riley. His sister had a party to go to and didn’t want to miss it. Guess grand parents know when  there grandkids are growing up when going to a party is more important.

 

Someone needs to tell him he is getting to big for it..

     We did go to a small fair on Saturday again not much going on there either.

Grandpa,Riley and Annie

 

This little piggy went to market and ended up staying and was trying to stay warm..

 

  Riley and Angela had to pass on the hole pig thing so we went to a bar-b-que place where you don’t have to look your meal in the eye.

 

It was so good I forgot to take a picture of it.  That’s it for our not so much going on weekend,

Thanks for stopping by and have a good new week.

ONE DAY CLOSER TO OUR DREAM